As the world was getting ready to enter a new decade, I couldn’t help but think about the twists and turns that this roller-coaster called life had taken me on over the past ten years. A lot of us were super reflective, myself included. This year, I will turn 30 and I can’t help but think about my 20’s: the highs, the lows and the in-betweens. Here is a letter I wrote to my younger self:
You’ve made it, you’ve entered adulthood. Remember when you were a little girl and you would tell your mother that you couldn’t wait to be a grown up? Let’s laugh together. You were in such a rush to grow up. You were always ahead of your time in some ways. This year will mark your 30th birthday and you will have learnt so much about yourself by the time you celebrate your new age.
Here are the things that I would like to say to you:
Don’t be afraid to be yourself. You won’t realize this until later but authenticity is an invaluable gift. Give it to yourself freely. Believe in its power because nobody can be you. That’s your superpower. You will spend this period of your life trying to be anything but you. You will run away from yourself because you won’t know who you are and what it is you want out of life. Get to know who you really are and don’t be afraid to cut people off during this transition.
Unfortunately, worry and worrying will play a part in your life. Anxiety will eclipse your 20’s but you will overcome. With the help of family, friends and professionals, your health will improve. There will be moments that will test your wellbeing though. They will mold you into the strong and self-sufficient women you will eventually become. Remember to stop worrying about things that you can’t control. Let go, have faith and trust the process.
Many people will walk in and out of your life: some will be a blessing and some will be a burden. Know when to let go and learn how to let go. A lot of people hold on in the hope that things will get better and said person/situation will change. This is ever really the case. You will entertain romantic relationships that you shouldn’t have even have spent a good minute in. One particular experience will lead you down an entirely different path: the road to self-love, self-realization and self-worth. It will be tough at times but you will love it and you will love you. Cheers to putting yourself first and never settling for less.
You will ignore your gut so many times. You won’t listen to your heart because you were never shown how to. Decisions are tough but they have to be made so stop caring so much about what others will think when you find it’s time to leave a certain situation: whether it’s a job or a friendship. Closed doors and new beginnings are not something to penalize yourself for. New beginnings will lead you to something that’s even greater than what you had before. Relax and do what you need to do to be happy. You deserve nothing but happiness.
Paulo Coelho once said, “Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.” I’ve never heard a truer word said. Everybody and their mama are going to push their own agendas onto you! It will be tiring and frustrating because you are going to feel like you are being dragged in so many different directions. Don’t fret because you will be exactly where you need to be. You’ll have walked away from a career you thought that was meant for you but it will be all worth it in the end. Thank people for their advice but remember that you are not obligated to take it. Live your life on your own terms (and you will learn how to stop seeking validation from people who don’t matter)
Travelling will become a breath of fresh air. You will experience new countries and new cultures and create beautiful memories. Keep doing more of this.
As you enter your 30’s, you may not be where you want to be and that’s ok. Everybody’s journey is different so hold your head high and continue to run your own race.
If you could give your younger self once piece of advice, what would it be?
I hope you enjoyed this post and do feel free to leave a comment and let me know what you think xo