10 Things You Can Do To Reinvent Yourself After A Break Up

 I’ve written quite a few posts about relationships and life as a single woman and its been amazing to read your comments, whether you’re sharing your own personal experiences or an opinion, its so appreciated.

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This is another relationship related post BUT it is a little different than what I’ve done before… I have joined forces with the lovely Wini Boansi to share tips on how you can reinvent yourself after a breakup. Wini is a content creator/writer and blogger (like myself) and she’s also a vlogger too! – don’t forget to subscribe to her channel.

Wini and I came up with the idea for this post as we felt that a lot of young women would be inspired. I think that we live in a time where too much emphasis is put on the environmental aspect of getting over a break up (e.g: don’t listen to sad songs) but I think that getting over a break up lies in reinvention. Reinvention is essential because you’re not the same person once you’ve had your heart broken or experienced a disappointment, so looking within is a must…

How to reinvent yourself after a breakup by Wini


Knowledge is power so taking in useful information and tips (such as what you are currently reading) is definitely a step in the right direction. Read books, blogs, forums, articles etc. on various ways you can overcome a break-up. Alexandra Redcay’s talk on selecting the right relationship is a real eye opener.

After a previous breakup, I realised that I was not confident about myself. Coincidentally I stumbled across a blog and the owner of the blog had written a book entitled Men Don’t Love Women Like You .The title is bizarre I know, however the book provides multiple ways on how to become confident within yourself, as well as tips to use when you are ready to start dating again. (I promise you that this book is empowering and has done wonders for me!)

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Definitely pick up a new hobby. Were you thinking about getting involved with yoga? Do your research and find out where the nearest yoga class is! Into make up? Why not kick-start that blog or YouTube channel that you’ve been contemplating about for the past 6 months? Now is the time to preoccupy your time and mind with a hobby that compliments the new you.

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Whatever new hobby you take on, make sure it is something that adds positivity and value to your life. Make sure it puts a smile on your face and excites you. Even if it is something you have not previously thought about doing, what’s the harm in trying something new? Step outside of your comfort zone.


Breakups may not always end badly, however, the fact of the matter is that you are no longer in a relationship with someone you once cared for. During this time, you may feel low or very reflective about the situation. Rather than staying fixated on what could have been, try to do little things to make you feel good.

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Below is a list of a few ways:

A trip to the nail shop

Cook or order in your favourite food

Relaxing bath

Spa Day/Weekend


Communication is key. During a breakup you may experience emotions that you’ve never felt before. Talking to someone can make a difference. Confide in someone you trust: it can be a family member, friend, a professional or it might even be with a stranger that you cross paths with while on your travels… you never know. For those of you who are more introverted why not try writing a journal? You will gain confidence in expressing your thoughts and feelings in various ways.

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Mindfulness and meditation can help you to manage your emotions and thoughts after a breakup. 

Acknowledging how you feel about the situation, and not suppressing your emotions is key. You need to understand why you feel the way that you do, and if while meditating you can’t quite understand why, try writing down how you feel, exactly how it comes to mind.

Although we may have no control over the breakup, we do have control on how we allow the break up to affect us. Doing a simple thing such as closing your eyes and focusing on your breathing, your feelings and thoughts, is key to overcoming your breakup.

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If at anytime you are feeling tempted to react harshly/negatively close your eyes and meditate on that idea. Reflect on what the possible consequences of reacting that way may be, and try to find a compassionate way of dealing with the situation. Forgiveness is not compulsory, but if you feel that it may be the best way to let go of any hostile feelings, use mindfulness and meditation to aid that decision.

How to reinvent yourself after a breakup by Kelle


Prayer has provided me with so much clarity since my break up. If you don’t pray, then alternatively you can practice meditation instead. Prayer allows you to open yourself up spirituality, without a fear of judgement or condemnation. When you pray, I would advise that you be completely honest with yourself. Tell God how you are really feeling, after all, he is your Father and he will comfort you through good times and bad times.

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I remember watching a T.D Jakes sermon about a week after I had moved back home. Everything he was saying related to what I went through and I remember trying to be so strong, taking it all in but within seconds I started to cry. I realised that I needed that outlet, so to add to Wini’s earlier point, if you need to cry, cry. If you need to shout, scream, kick, break: just do it. It’s all a part of the healing process which will allow you to move on with your life.


This is always a challenging one because women especially are taught to stay indoors, eat the biggest box of chocolates and watch romantic movies until the tears start falling. It’s time to get rid of this way of thinking because it does more harm than good. Now is the time to keep yourself busy. Becoming single (especially if it’s sudden) will shock your system and you’ll find you have a lot of spare time on your hands so socialising is essential.

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Meet up with that friend you haven’t seen in a few months, visit your favourite restaurant, go to the library, attend workshops related to areas you may be interested in, take a class at the gym instead of using equipment all the time…the opportunities for socialising are endless. Get yourself out there, don’t hide. You are entering a new chapter in your life and you should do it with your head held high. I’m not saying you should go out every weekend or fill up your diary, monitor your social activities and of course, if it does become overwhelming, take a step back. There’s nothing wrong with a nice glass of wine, good food and Netflix.


I’ve discussed looking within in my posts: Operation Build A Man and Musings Of An Introvert. This is something that some women fail to do. In the minds of some women, it is always the man’s fault. This type of thinking is very unhealthy because you won’t be able to reflect and evaluate your behaviour in your relationship. Honesty IS the best policy and it’s not conducive to what we tell others, we also have to be honest with ourselves too!

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You may decide to identify your personality type. I found out I’m an INFJ and I have to say, this has helped me understand myself a great deal. You can also write down things you like about yourself and what you think could be improved on. In addition to getting to know yourself better, you have to take a look around you. Are you surrounding yourself with people who bring out the best in you? Are your circle positive, uplifting and supportive?


I would really encourage women out there who have gone through a difficult break up to self evaluate. As mentioned earlier, you won’t be the same person you were before: your character will change, you will have new needs/expectations/goals in life and in personal relationships, so keep an open mind. The ‘I Am Who I Am’ complex is self destructive and will not do you any favours.


Invest in something that improves your space and enhances your wellbeing. I’m not saying you have to remodel your home or redesign your room but there are little things that you can do to improve your surroundings. Do you have things that you want to give to charity? Would a book organiser be a welcome addition to your table? Is there an old computer or stereo that you need to get rid of? If the answer is yes, then take action because it has been psychologically proven that cleaning improves mental and physical health.

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Reinventing yourself after a breakup (especially a difficult one) isn’t easy but you are in control of the healing process. Take steps to work towards a happier, healthier and more confident you. No situation is permanent and you have the ability to bounce back from any setback life brings to your door. Think positive, be positive.

I hope you enjoyed this post guys and as always, feel free to leave a comment below. Also, don’t forget to like and subscribe to Wini’s blog, channel (there are links at the top of the post) and to IKS

I created a thread on Twitter last year about getting over a break up which can be found here

Kel xo


Juvia’s Place The Saharan II Palette Review

In this post, I’ll be reviewing the Juvia’s Place Saharan II palette.

I purchased this palette around a month ago from Beauty Bay because I’ve heard so many vloggers and bloggers mention Juvia’s Place palettes and how amazing they look on women of colour. I’ll share pictures of the swatches, the palette itself and the look I created. (Please be kind because when it comes to eyeshadow application, I am not a connoisseur. I probably struggle just as much as the majority of women out there do!)


The Juvia’s Place palettes were specifically created with women of colour (WoC) in mind and this is why I really wanted to do this review.

At first, I was very skeptical about purchasing a eye shadow palette for £20. I definitely read some reviews beforehand and I’d advise any of you who are interested in this product to do the same.

As you can see from the swatches, all of the shades in this palette compliment darker skin tones beautifully. The palette comprises of a combination of metallic, duo chrome and matte shades. I assume that the matte shades should be used as transition shades (something that helps to merge colours together) and the others shades are meant for the lids only.

What I love about this palette the most is that the shades are highly pigmented. A little really does go a long way, so don’t expect to run out of a certain shade anytime soon. I find that with two-three light strokes with a eyeshadow brush, I am able to get a very good coverage so take it from me, less is more.

As mentioned earlier, I’m not amazing at applying eyeshadow but I found it very easy with this palette.With Moroccan inspired influences, the rich patterns will have you feeling and looking like a goddess.

Below is a picture of the look I created. I used the shades Nomad and Fez.

Pros: all shades are easy to apply, not a lot of product is needed to get a good amount of coverage, nice variety of colours which compliment darker complexions, highly pigmented shades, fingertips can be used to place product on lids, good value for money.

Cons: pricing may be an issue if you aren’t crazy about spending a little bit extra on a eye shadow palette but on the other hand, because a small amount of product is needed, this is a product that will last for quite some time. When it comes to makeup, everyone has their preferences: its either high street, in between or premium. Always wear makeup that makes you look and feel your best.

Personally, I’m very glad I went ahead and bought this palette and I’m actually very tempted to buy another one! If you’ve used any other Juvia’s Place palettes, please feel free to drop your recommendations in the comments section below.

The Juvia’s Place Saharan II palette is priced at £20.00 and can be purchased from Beauty Bay.

I hope you have enjoyed this review. I enjoy hearing from you all so please let me know what you think. Don’t forget to like, subscribe and tell your friends about my space.

Kel xo 

Operation ‘Build-A-Man’ Needs To Be Cancelled

Before I start, I would just like to say that this post is not an attack on any woman who has helped her partner or a potential partner in any way: whether financially, emotionally etc. In life, I believe that we all make decisions based on what we feel and what we believe is right.

In this post, I’m going to be talking about what I call ‘Operation Build-A-Man’ and why I believe it should be terminated with immediate effect. Two people can come together and build together, (that is the expectation), but it isn’t a woman’s job to build, heal, fix, repair or mould anybody’s son and if there are any men reading this, you will probably say that the same goes for women.

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Building someone UP and building WITH someone are two completely different things. In order to build with someone, they need to have potential and they need to be progressive. There is no point of saying you want to achieve certain goals if you aren’t prepared to actively work towards achieving them. On the other hand, building someone UP is pretty similar to building a house. There’s no vision, no plan, you are starting with a plain surface almost. Building someone up in a world where roles, responsibilities and actions are at the core of our being is one of the most draining things a woman can endure.

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In the book The Four Agreements, the author Don Miguel Ruiz, said something that stuck in my mind. He says that as people we are happy as we are and we need to realise this about other people too. If we can’t accept anybody as they are, we need to let go. Looking at someone and thinking ‘If only they expressed themselves more, If I spoke less, maybe they’d naturally become more ambitious/goal driven’ will bring you nothing but frustration and dissatisfaction.

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The truth is like a buffet, everything you need to see is right in front of you. Recognise your worth and don’t jump into situations for the sake of it. What is meant for you will not pass you by.

Here are some tips that I’d like to share with you in the hope that you don’t find yourself in a dating situation or relationship where you are giving a lot more than you are receiving:

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Get to know who you really are (likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses…THE LOT) before you put yourself out there. In a previous post, Musings of an Introvert, I talk about the quiz I took which lead to me finding out I was an INFJ. If you don’t know what your personality type is, I recommend taking the quiz or any other personality based quiz that is expert approved. 

Another thing I recommend is finding out what your love language is. The five love languages are different ways in which love can be expressed and experienced. Your love language will help you understand yourself better and will also allow you to be clear about what you expect in relationships, whether they are newly formed or whether they are in existence.

Be friends first! Be friends first! For the love of our sweet Lord, if that man is meant for you, he won’t go anywhere. Relationships are rushed into so quickly these days, and they crash just as fast. I was watching an episode of Oprah’s Masterclass and Cindy Crawford was talking about marriage and she said that the one thing she realised was that love is best rooted in friendship. I remember repeating this to myself time and time again because it was just so true. Being friends first allows both of you to build a solid connection. You get a good idea of what the person you are dating is about and you will be able to identify any warning signs because you (hopefully) won’t have caught feelings.

Working on yourself and understanding that a real relationship is about being with someone who compliments you, not someone who completes you. So what if your friends are in a relationship every six months and you’ve been single for almost a year? It really doesn’t matter. Look at the positives. This is your time. This is your time to live your best life and work on being the woman that you were destined to become. 

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Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed this post.

Don’t forget to like and subscribe and tell your friends about my space.

Kel xo

How To Find The Perfect Deals Online

Searching for the perfect deal online can be such a struggle. Surprisingly, this hasn’t put us Brits off online shopping. According to the Daily Mail, 95% of Britons buy goods from online retailers. One in four UK residents shop online at least once a week.

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The majority of us have horror stories about items that look nothing like how they appear in the picture or very expensive delivery costs and this can put us off shopping online. However, when it comes to online shopping, don’t focus too much on how long it may take you to find what you are looking for, but take your time. Research is key if you want to get a good deal.

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In another short but sweet post, I am going to be sharing a few tips with you all on how you can master the art that is online shopping and ensure you get your money’s worth when you are looking for that perfect deal…

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1) Always check reviews – After all, we are all consumers. We invest in products and services so why not see what your fellow buyers are saying about a product or service before you choose to invest in it? The majority of websites tally up the opinions of customers, from good to bad or 5-1 etc, so be sure to read testimonials so that you can make a wise and informed choice. Never be sold on a product/service just because someone said that it worked for them!

2) Subscribe, subscribe, subscribe – If you are looking for a bargain online and you have found a product/service that has caught your eye, then subscribe to the brand’s mailing list before you seal the deal. Many brands are very generous to new customers so it is likely that there will be a discount code in your welcome email. Downloading apps as well is also another way you can secure that discount before you make your purchase.

3) Comparisons – Always compare prices if you want to get the best deal. Be careful with deals such as 3 for 2 or 1/3 off. 3 for 2 deals are created to make you spend more money and usually, a 1/3 off is a brand’s way of trying to ensure they make a quick profit. The item you really want could actually be half price of buy one, get one free on another site so always shop around. The Google shopping page is a fast and easy price comparison tool.

4) Avoid high delivery charges – Choosing click and collect at the checkout is the best way to do this. It doesn’t cost a lot and on some sites, it actually means you get your items a lot quicker.

5) Bulk buy (if necessary!) – If you find an amazing deal on something you have been looking for for quite some time, then I would recommend buying more than one, especially if there’s high demand for it. This comes in handy if you are shopping for necessities such as cosmetics, food etc.

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If you or anyone you know is looking for a great deal, then check out the Latest Deals website .

This is a collaborative post between myself and Latest Deals.

I hope you have enjoyed this post.

Don’t forget to like and subscribe.

Tell your friends about Kelle’s space too.

Kel xo

Matte Battle: Which of these Topshop lipsticks do you prefer?

As you are all probably aware by now, I’m a huge lipstick fan. I love experimenting with different shades but my only requirement is that any lipstick I use HAS to have a matte finish. As I have oily/combination skin, matte lipsticks draw less attention to it, so if you have oily/combination skin, matte lipsticks are the way to go.

I was sent three lipsticks from Topshop to try out and I must say I was very impressed.

The three shades I received were Inhibition, Depth and Beguiled.

(Swatches – from L-R: Depth, Beguiled and Inhibition)

I’m just going to share my opinion on these lipsticks with you before I show you the pictures:

My personal favourite out of the three is Inhibition. I’m obsessed with pink lipsticks. I own about twenty, I swear. I love how pigmented the colour is and it really compliments by complexion. I’d love to hear from you as to which shade you prefer.

Generally, I like that the lipsticks aren’t glossy and they are long lasting. I always test lipsticks by how they look once I’ve finished eating the messiest lunch/dinner lol and this one barely budged at all. I was so impressed. At £8 each, you are getting your money’s worth because you don’t need to apply a lot of product in order to get full coverage. Inhibition is perfect if you want to start using bright lipsticks or you like the colour pink. Beguiled would be more suited to the ladies out there who love to stand out and make a statement, however, I would recommend that if you do decide to try Beguiled and Depth, you use a lip liner first. I actually don’t own a lip liner so I found it very difficult to perfectly apply all the shades. Other than that, I would definitely recommend these lipsticks to all the beauty junkies out there.

(Left to right: Depth, Beguiled and Inhibition)

Pros – matte finish, good value for money, nice packaging, formula, colour is pigmented

Cons – not 100% easy to apply, some shades more bold than others

Topshop Long Lasting Lipsticks can be found on their website and are priced at £8.

I hope you have enjoyed this very short but sweet review lovelies. Please feel free to comment and let me know which shade is your favourite, I just love hearing from you all. Don’t forget to like and subscribe and tell your friends about Kelle’s space.

Kel xo



How To Be An Educator And Still Have Time For Yourself

‘Is there really such thing as a work/life balance when you are an educator?’

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Some of you will say yes, some of you will shrug and some of you will totally disagree but with whatever job you choose to do, finding a work/life balance is a necessity. As an educator myself, I do find it very challenging to make time for my planning (even though I’m supply/cover and don’t really need to do much) and my social life (i.e: spending time with family, friends, making time for hobbies and other forms of self care). While, we can agree that this is a struggle, it isn’t impossible.

If we don’t take the time to pay attention to our needs as well as our responsibilities, we will suffer. Emotionally, physically, and in severe cases, mentally. 

Here are some tips that I would like to share with you that help me (and will hopefully help you) keep and maintain a work/life balance:

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Have a plan – ‘Planning’ is the word every educator dreads hearing (because it takes up a great deal of our time) but its important to actually plan your planning. Use a notebook or an organiser to write down which lessons/resources you are going to plan/prepare first. Having a plan for your planning makes life so much easier (even if you’re doing paperwork, have a plan!). Sometimes working sporadically can cause burnout because you could easily become overwhelmed. It’s actually been proven that having ‘to do lists’ and ticking each thing off as you go promotes a sense of self satisfaction.

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Give yourself a break – This is the one thing we fail to do as educators. Sometimes it feels like there are a million and one things to do in one day and each day is a endless struggle to be a modern day superhero. It’s important to give yourself time out if you want a healthy work/life balance. Don’t feel bad about it either. Stop working on Friday evenings, try to do something nice on a Saturday/Sunday. Taking time out helps you to recharge and unwind. It also improves concentration and increases productivity.

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Stay healthy – Working from 6am – 6pm some days will have you reaching for caffeine and sugar (trust me) but its important to eat as healthily as you can. In a school/college/uni day, so much is expected from educators. We need to teach our students, mark their work, plan activities/assemblies and so much more. It is a very demanding role and if you are healthy and you are eating right, you will be able to perform better in your role (and hopefully avoid sick days).

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Support support, support- As mentioned in the previous point, so much is expected from educators these days. Make sure you have a strong and supportive circle. Family, friends and colleagues that you can confide in when you get stressed. This is so important because the worst thing you could possibly do for yourself is bottle up all your feelings and emotions. As well as being on the receiving end of support, make sure you are giving it too. Remember, once upon a time you were a trainee. You may have a junior member of staff or a support that needs some kind words of reassurance from time to time.

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Manage your time – It’s nice to feel like a modern day superhero but remember that your time is precious and it is your responsibility to use it effectively. It would be amazing to help everyone with everything because that’s what you may feel naturally inclined to do – but are you doing it at the risk of your own productivity? If so, then you need to take a back seat and learn how to use the word NO. No is such a simple word yet it is incredibly difficult to say because we fear that we will be judged or condemned. Be honest and assertive over what you can do and what you can’t do. Saying NO isn’t as bad as you think it is.

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These are some things that help when trying to maintain a work/life balance. In addition to the tips I’ve shared, I think that you need to have an open mind first of all. No two days are the same. Some days, you will leave school feeling so tired you’ll be contemplating your career choice, while other days you’ll be feeling like you have the best job in the world.

To educate means to teach, inform or inspire others. You are contributing to help mould the future generation. Whether you are a teacher, supply teacher, teaching assistant or 1:1 support worker, you really do have the greatest gift of all, and that gift is making a valuable difference to children’s lives every single day.

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Keep up the good work (and don’t forget to take care of you!)

This post is in collaboration with SupplyNow

SupplyNow recruit supply staff (teachers, cover supervisors, TA’s) in schools through their much talked about app. The process of booking work through the app means more pay for teachers and less fees for the schools that recruit them. It’s a win win situation so if you are looking for school based work, get in touch with them here.

I hope you have enjoyed reading this post and don’t forget to like and subscribe to It’s Kelle’s Space

Kel xo