Musings of an Introvert

I am an introvert.

It took me some time to realise this.

It took me some time to accept this.

But I am who I am and I am unapologetically me.

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An introvert is someone who prefers to be in calm and minimally stimulating environments. It is estimated that approximately half of the world’s population are introverts, so why do the majority of introverts, such as myself, grow up thinking there’s something wrong with them?

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In my younger years, I remember being completely engrossed in my toys and my books. As I sit in my dining room typing this post, I’m reminded of the numerous Disney, Roald Dahl, R.L.Stine and Jacqueline Wilson books I had on my bookshelf.Playing outside didn’t really excite me the way it did my peers. As long as I could create and immerse myself in my own environment, I was always at peace. 

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As I’ve got older, I’ve learned that through peace, comes power. I’m not afraid to be on my own. Spending time alone is a fulfilling experience. It doesn’t mean I have no friends (I do) and it certainly doesn’t mean that I’m impossible to be around. Self reflecting is what an introvert does best. Introverts have a rich and vivid inner world. Just because we are quiet and we like to be alone at times, it doesn’t mean we are anti social.

To all the world’s introverts, I have a message for you:

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In case you were wondering, here are some signs that you might be or that you are an introvert:

  • You find social functions draining 
  • You enjoy spending time alone 
  • You have a small group of close friends
  • You value and appreciate authenticity in others and can’t stand people who are putting on a facade
  • You are self aware
  • You like jobs that involve independence

Of course there are many more signs of introversion but if you relate to one or more of the points above, then it is highly likely you are introverted.

A dear friend of mine who writes at Introvert Mama Blog (follow her!), introduced me to a free personality test. All you have to do is answer all of the questions as honestly as you can, of course, and you will find out what your personality type is. When I did the test, I also requested to be sent a free report which explained my results in more depth. I found out that I am an INFJ (Introversion, Intuition, Feeling, Judging).

Are you an introvert? Or do you know an introvert? I love hearing from you all so feel free to share your experiences.

Kel xo


5 Signs It’s Time To End A Friendship

This post is pretty self explanatory to be honest. As we get older, our circle of friends will increase or decrease. It’s so important to have a strong friendship support system: one that encourages, supports and uplifts you at all times.

Here are five signs that it’s time to walk away from a friendship:

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1) One sided friendships

Your time, energy and space is so precious so make time for people who make time for you. If they are constantly cancelling plans or not texting or phoning you on a fairly regular basis, then you need to reconsider your friendship. Yes, we are all busy with life. Yes, we all have responsibilities BUT we will make time for the people we want to be around, so don’t be fooled. What you’re giving and what you’re getting should level up in your friendship.

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2) Terrible behaviour

This is one of the biggest friendship killers. If your friend gossips about you, they can’t be trusted. If your friend does things they know will hurt you or make you feel uncomfortable then they are not your friend. It’s up to you to create a threshold for tolerance – once anyone gets over it, you need to cut them out. As with relationships, set the standard for friendships too. Be open, be understanding, be forgiving but do not be a doormat. Without trust, there can be no friendship. If your friend is ‘stanning’ for you in your face but doing the opposite when your back is turned then they are not your friend. Keep it moving.

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3) Lack of contact

Any effort you make in a friendship should be reciprocated. Being the only one making contact or arranging to meet can be very draining. Sometimes, its not even about arranging meets, just sending a message to your friend to check on them can make a difference to their day. When friendships are forced, they lack genuinity. One thing you need to know (if you don’t already) – is that there are people out there forming friendships solely on the basis of gaining and giving nothing in return. Look out for so called friends who get in touch only when they need something. 

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4) Toxicity

Some friendships will help us grow while others won’t. It is a fact of life. Friendships, like relationships do have the ability to become toxic. If you don’t feel secure or happy around your friend, this can be a sign of trouble. Remember that healthy friendships are built around mutual respect, compassion, freedom of thinking, love, sharing and most importantly listening. If your friendship is leaving you drained them its time to cut it.

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5) Losses and Gains – Pree their reactions

Now, it would have been impossible for me to do a friendship post without talking about L’s and G’s, otherwise known as losses and gains. Both play a significant role in allowing us to determine how our friends feel about us really. When you take an L, you should have the support of your friend (100%). They should make sure you are fine and try to reassure you in some way. Women should always support each other. 

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However, on the other hand, if you experience a gain (whether its work, love or any other kind of progression), are your friends genuinely happy for you? Or do they find a way to verbally minimise your achievement(s)? Sometimes, elevation requires isolation and you may find yourself losing a few friends whether you take an L or a G and that’s ok. Thank God for the time they spent in your life and wish them well in all they go on to do.

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I was on Twitter late last year, scrolling my feed and I saw a young woman tweet about her attainment of a new job. She then went on to add that when she informed a close friend about her exciting new opportunity, she was less than happy for her. I found it quite shocking but unfortunately, these are the times that we live in. You will be very surprised at which life events (good or bad) add or remove people from your world.

What are your friendship dealbreakers? I always love to hear from you so feel free to drop a comment below!

Cheers to healthy and lifelong friendships in 2018.

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Thank you for reading and don’t forget to like and subscribe 

Kel xo


Beauty Focus: Natural Lipsticks

Natural lipsticks are having a bit of a moment. Industry experts all over the world are hailing this new beauty phenomenon. Millions of women apply lipstick every day but many aren’t aware that the majority of lipsticks contain harmful ingredients such as lead. Lead is a neurotoxin and can be dangerous even in small doses. According to Health Line, lead can cause mental and physical impairment.

However, lead is actually not listed as an ingredient on lipsticks so it may be hard to identify which lipsticks have it and which ones don’t. If you do decide to adopt a conscious approach when choosing a new lipstick, here are a few reasons why you are doing the right thing:

1) Safe to use – natural lipsticks use herbal products which make them completely safe for use on the lips

2) Paraben free – it has been reported that parabens can cause hormonal imbalance in women

3) Lead free – as mentioned earlier, lead has been linked to mental and physical impairment so you won’t need to worry about any exposure to the metal when you are eating or drinking

4) Healthier lips – because of the natural ingredients, your lips will look and feel healthier and they will be deeply hydrated too – that’s an added bonus!

5) Not tested on animals – the components of natural lipsticks are actually not tested on animals. Commercial lipsticks are tested on animals unfortunately.

These are some pretty amazing benefits right? So, that’s why I was really excited to try the new 100% natural lipsticks from Burt’s Bees! In addition to the 18 stunning shades, each lipstick is made from natural ingredients including moringa oil, beeswax (community sourced), mimosa flower wax and raspberry seed oil.

I was sent three shades: Doused Rose, Russet River and Orchid Ocean.

(L-R: (513) Doused Rose, (533) Orchid Ocean and (532) Russet River)


If you are after a long lasting natural lipstick, then this is the one for you. It’s easy to apply and I can honestly say that my lips felt soft and hydrated throughout the day. As you know, I tend to prefer matte lipsticks but I’d happily consider using natural lipsticks instead. My only con is that I wish the shades were more pigmented but other than that, I would definitely wear Orchid Ocean and Russet River during the week. Doused Rose is a bit too light for my complexion.

(Orchid Ocean)

(Russet River)

(Doused Rose)

The Burt’s Bees 100% Natural Lipstick is available to purchase from John Lewis, Boots, Feel Unique, and Look Fantastic and is priced at £9.99.

Oily Skin Tips

Today, we are going to focus on oily skin.

Now oily skin is something that many women deal with on a daily basis. If you have oily skin, you may have enlarged pores, a dull, shiny or thick complexion or blackheads, pimples and other blemishes.

Oiliness can change but that’s dependent on the time of year or the weather. Things such as humidity, stress or hormonal imbalances can make oily skin worse.

Here are five things you can do to control/manage oily skin:

1) Cleanse, tone and moisturise: these three things are so important if you want good skin, especially when managing oily skin. Toning can minimise pores and clear away excess dirt, leaving you with a smooth and glowing complexion.

2) Water, water, water: if you want amazing skin, drink water. Drink as much water as you can. Water rectifies the over production of oil in the skin.

3) Exfoliate: exfoliating removes excess skin and according to Via Buff, people with oily skin types should exfoliate every single day. I use an amazing exfoliating scrub from St Ives.

4) Eat clean: this is tricky (I find this challenging myself) but it’s so important to eat clean. There are so many articles that advise you on the right foods to eat for oily skin and also, which foods you should avoid. It is possible that you may be eating a particular food that is making your skin oily.

5) Use products for your skin type: one of the biggest faux pas some women make is that they use products that are not suitable for their skin type. Ensure your skincare products and cosmetics are oil free (with a matte/semi matte finish for foundations).

I hope this post has helped and feel free to share any tips you may have when it comes to stopping that shine!

Kel xo

20 Lessons I’ve Learned As A Single Woman

In this post, I’m going to share all the lessons I have learnt during this period of single-dom. I think that there are so many negative connotations that come with being single but it can actually be (and has proven to be) a very transformational period in a woman’s life. Contrary to what society may think or suggest, choosing to be single or being single for a long time doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you or that you’re picky…

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1) The first few months as a single person WILL be challenging (do not listen to anyone who tells you they will not be).

You will cry, you will smile, you will experience a multitude of emotions all at once.

2) Understand that you are embarking on a new journey and you will need to get to know yourself again, no matter how self assured you feel.

3) It really is better to be alone and happy than to be unhappy in a relationship. If you are not happy, walk away.

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4) A relationship should be your safe haven. Any relationship you are in should serve and honour you. If it doesn’t, you need to leave.

5) Don’t be afraid to reevaluate your standards. Know what it is that you want and don’t settle!

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6) Your circle is everything! Surround yourself with people who support and uplift you.

7) You will have times where you will reminisce and wonder if you made a mistake. Don’t beat yourself up when this happens, it’s natural to miss what you once had especially if you were in a long term relationship. Be thankful for the times you spent in your union and the lessons it has taught you.

8) You are single because you are supposed to be. Enjoy this period! Work, smile, eat, have fun, do what makes you happy!

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9) Don’t let the opinions of others influence your choices. Just because you have been single for a while, it doesn’t mean you need someone special in your life. You make decisions that are right for you and no one else.

10) Exes will try and come back into your life. This in inevitable. Stay strong, remind yourself of why you had to leave that particular situation.

11) Comparison is the thief of joy. Run your own race. Things may not seem amazing now but everything is coming together for your good.

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12) Don’t feel like a failure because things didn’t work out. It may be hard to accept but everything happens for a reason. If that’s where you were meant to be, things would have flowed effortlessly.

13) Don’t deny your emotions. If you’re not ok, that’s absolutely fine. We all have moments when we aren’t ourselves. It’s life.

14) Keep your head up, look forward and smile.

15) Don’t settle! Don’t settle! Don’t settle.

16) Affirmations are everything, especially if you are finding it hard to lift your mood. Affirm that you are worthy of love and other positive self talk. Remember that you attract what you magnify.

17) Everyone who shows you attention isn’t worthy of your time.

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18) Your time, energy and space are SO precious. Invest carefully.

19) Treat yourself! Don’t be afraid to treat yourself. Get your hair done, take yourself out to eat, go and watch your favourite film. Do the things you enjoy! Learn how to enjoy your own company.

20) Own this moment in your life. You don’t owe anyone any explanations.

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Over the past year and a half, I have learned so much. I can honestly say that I haven’t taken this period in my life for granted. One thing I would advice single women (and men) to do is have an open mind. You have to love yourself before you can truly love someone else. Don’t be afraid of this season. One day, you will look back and you will be grateful for this period in your life.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post.

For those of you who are struggling to move on from a breakup, I created this thread on Twitter about a year ago which you can view here.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe and tell your friends about my space.

Kel xo

My Self Care Saturday

Hi guys, in this post I’m going to be telling you all how I practised self care this weekend. It is so easy to get caught up in work and other commitments that we forget to take some time out to look after ourselves – we are all guilty of this. Self care is essential. It is something that you provide for you. In order to practise self care, you need to be able to identify your own needs and take the necessary steps to meet them. The result? You will feel more confident, productive and happier!

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I booked a spa treatment last month but wasn’t able to get an appointment as all weekends were booked. Fortunately, I was able to get a 2 hour slot yesterday. I went to Montcalm Royal London House, which is in the City (not too far from Old Street). I hadn’t been to the spa since I went to Amsterdam, so we are talking 3/4 months. I had the most amazing body massage. In addition to this, I used the sauna and steam room (twice) and the jacuzzi as well. This brief retreat was needed so I am so glad I was able to go. In 2018, I vow to have a spa morning once every 2-3 months.


When I left the spa, I was very hungry because I didn’t have breakfast before I left, so I walked to The Breakfast Club but there was a queue outside and I hate waiting for a long time to eat food, so I went to Bills instead. I had a lovely green smoothie, scrambled eggs on toast and a salad. When it comes to restaurants, Bills are a favourite of mine and not because their calamari is pretty amazing, I just love the atmosphere and the staff are always really friendly and helpful.

Once I’d finished, I went back to my area and got my eyebrows done. On the subject of perfect brows, the struggle is real. I’m still applying castor oil to them every night so hopefully the left one will have a growth spurt (the hairs are quite sparse).

So that was my Self Care Saturday! 

What do you do to practice self care this week or this weekend? I’d love to hear from you all.

Kel xo